Several years ago, I was going through some bumps in the road and felt like no matter who I talked to for guidance the message was consistent: “Why are you depriving yourself?” On one hand I got what they were saying but on the other I wasn’t clear on what I had to change. I just didn’t seem to have the strength to change. It wasn’t until I started to feel it.  I was tired, irritable and lonely. I knew something had to change but I didn’t really know how. I heard all the things about doing something for yourself, but I didn’t have the extra cash to do all that stuff and I didn’t know how to let others do that for me. You see I didn’t know how to receive, yep that simple and yet powerful word receive. It is about allowing others to take care of you, to give to you without you doing a thing but receive.

Do you find it hard to receive? Are you aware that when you don’t receive you are rejecting love, abundance and friendship? You are actually depriving that person of the joy of giving a gift to you. Now you know this all to well, since you are the giver and you know how frustrating it is when people don’t receive from you, so why do you do it to others?

I used to think receiving meant I was weak that couldn’t take care of myself, that I needed other’s support. It weakened my Miss Independent attitude. I thought I had to prove to people I can do it all on my own. All I learned is doing it all on your own makes you one lonely person.

So when did it change? Severals years ago, I was working in a job and it was a couple of days before Christmas when a co-worker gave me an unexpected gift. Ironically, my manager didn’t even give us gifts but this guy gave gifts to our whole department. I was touched since I was only part-time and wasn’t very close with him. What touched me more is that the gift he gave me was so thoughtful. He knew I love Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, so he went to the store in NYC and got me a mug with Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups in it. He told me how he had to go all over the place to find this. What shocked me the most is how much joy he had in giving.

I felt such guilt, in not having a gift for him. I even told him that and he said, “I do this because I loving giving.” I was so touched and shocked.  He just loved to be the giver and who am I to deny his joy? So, I didn’t feel right and bought him a little something, but you know it didn’t feel the same as I did it out of guilt. Ironically, this continued to happen to me, receiving unexpected gifts from friends and it each time it felt so wonderful to receive yet, I felt so much guilt that I had to do something for them. You know what I had to do for them was to receive it and love what they gave to me. Truthfully, these are the best gifts, the unexpected gifts that truly come from love. So, what I was doing was rejecting their love and joy and denying them the same.

As I learned this more and more and began to accept these gifts with love and simply sent a thank you card, my world changed. I noticed old negative relationships disappeared, my income started to increase and I was happier. I started becoming my authentic self life which made life more fun and satisfying.

I believe you can relate to my story, so I ask you this holiday season to give with true love, love from your heart, and to receive with that same love and joy. Embrace the universe as it responds to all the things you desire and want. The universe wants you to be happy, because when you receive you fill yourself with love and when you are full of love then you have more to give but you can’t run on empty. So receive.  Receive so you can give more today!

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